Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen

I had the idea of reviewing Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen before I had even seen it. What would I have written? Terrible acting, dire plot, awful screenplay…good effects though! And guess what? Having seen the film it’s all the above, not that that was difficult to predict though. So lets pick through the carnage (both on-screen and metaphorically). The whole premise of this film is to show off the specials effects. The plot and screenplay are an afterthought. The plot is riddled with holes, and pretty much forgotten about until the occasions when one of the characters pops up to explain what’s happening in such a way that you expect Basil Exposition to turn up at any moment. The screenplay isn’t even a screenplay as such and just seems to be a selection of unfunny gags and quips thrown together. The worse offenders being two Autobots who banter throughout. Imagine two Jar Jar Binks in the same film and this’ll give you some impression as to how painful it is. There is the occasional funny moment, mainly provided by John Tuturro, who is the only actor to come out of this mess with his credibility (just about) intact. Shia Labeouf's performance of tics and talkingandrepeatingwordsasquicklyaspossible grates, and Megan Fox quite literally does nothing (Oh yeah, apart from look hot! Natch). In addition, why Spielberg continues to attach his name to this rubbish is a complete mystery. Does he really find amusement in two dogs shagging? (a "gag" used twice!) So, to the effects. Yes, the effects are great, but overdone to such an extent that some of them start to look a bit ropey compared to the first movie. As for the battles between the robots, unless you’re going to add some originality to these fights then, basically, once you’ve seen one fight, you’ve seen them all. By the 4th or 5th scrap you’ll be bored, not thrilled, and the final battle scene just drags on for so long that this was the point in the film that I saw people walking out. I hope they demanded their money back. Forget the Transformers, it’s Michael Bay and Paramount who attempt the real deception here trying to pass this 150 minute mess off as a “film”.

The OC Film Sting Final Verdict
If you’re part of the target audience (i.e. Male and early teens) you’ll lap this up. For the rest of us, this is a dreadful shambles and one of the least intelligent blockbusters of modern times. Rating: 2/10.